chantal stone photography: the blog

January 6, 2007

More On Growth….

Filed under: Personal — chantal @ 4:32 pm

From 12/8/06….

I wrote a little about this the other day on the photoblog, but I just had to add a few more thoughts.
I feel I’ve reached a breakthrough, photographically speaking. I’ve always loved street photography. the candid, documentary style of HCB and others is what made me fall in love with photography in the first place. But it’s something I’ve always struggled with because I often would feel self-conscious when shooting strangers in public. As soon as someone would notice what I was doing, I would stop.

But the other night when I was photographing my children by some Christmas lights, I felt invigorated by the fact that people were so curious about what I was shooting. I felt completely uninhibited. After my children, I shot a few random passers-by, some store fronts, and a few other scenes. People were looking, wondering, and I kept on shooting.

And it was more than just a one time boost of self-confidence. Last night I was out shooting a dress rehearsal for a Christmas dance production. I photographed the performance, as well as some candid behind-the-scene shots. It was incredible. I was the photographer. I was completely in the zone, and I felt like I was doing exactly what I meant to be doing.

I’ve photographed weddings before, portraits, other special events that I’ve been paid for. I’ve been successful, I’ve been unsuccessful. And I’ve been ‘the photographer’ many times in the past. But this time its different. I think now, I finally believe that I’m worthy of the title. It’s a mental thing, I know. It’s self-realization of a life-long goal.

Ever since I was 15 I’ve wanted to be a photographer, for it to be my job, for people to know that it’s what I do. And now, that day is finally here. Now I just have to figure out how to make a decent living at it. So far, the pay sucks 😉

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