chantal stone photography: the blog

June 27, 2006

Conquering Self-doubt

Filed under: News — chantal @ 11:35 am

I need to write more.

I need to shoot more….photographs, that is.

On Sunday, our pastor preached a sermon about not letting our insecurities weigh us down or hold us back from receiving our blessings and fulfilling our destinies. Allowing feelings of self-doubt, feelings of not being good enough, feelings like we don’t deserve success, or that success is not ours to achieve often burdens so many people of faith. But this is a lesson we all can use, Christian or not.

I often find myself plagued by these very same insecurities. More than I should, I hear the little voices in my head saying that I’m not good enough, not smart enough or not talented enough; that no one wants to hear what I have to say or that no one would understand my particular brand of art, so why bother. Too often, I have listened to those voices.

How many times have I allowed these insecurities hinder me from achieving success? I dare not count. I can’t even begin to imagine how many opportunities I have missed due to the fact that I let these feelings of self-doubt cloud my vision. It saddens me to think of where I could be right now if I only I had the courage and confidence to go forth and pursue my destiny with full vigor.

All I know now is that there is something inside of me that needs to come out. It’s been there all along, for all of my life, rumbling quietly for far too long, slowly building and gaining momentum. Certain events throughout my life have quieted this sleeping giant, but like the magma that builds pressure beneath the earth, building to a great volcanic eruption, so is this rumble from within me ready to overflow.

It’s an urge to create, to start from nothing and end with something, something that is uniquely my own, my voice, my vision, for all to see, feel, read, interpret. You may not like it, you may never understand it, but you will know that it is me. I need to write, I need to photograph everything I see, when I can’t do that I need to sketch this or that and then maybe later turn it into a painting. I don’t even care that I may be less talented than my peers. Mine is a voice that needs to be heard.

I finally feel that I have the tools at hand to conquer the demons that have held me back for so long. And now, when I look around me, I see opportunity at every turn. The sleeping giant is awake, and I’m ready to take on the task at hand. The days of making excuses for why I can’t are over. I know now that I can. And I will. And it’s not so much due to this overwhelming feeling of self-confidence, for I am still battling the feelings of self-doubt, but it is because I can no longer deny myself the destiny that is laid before me. There is something great out there for me, and it is my job, my mission to find it, to conquer it, to claim it, to achieve it.

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3 Comments »

  1. Chantal, what a beautiful post. I’m glad I checked your blog and read it. I feel that way too, quite often.

    I’d like to share this with you, about what ‘talent’ means from a famous photographer. I have found it really encouraging when I feel inadequate.

    http://radiantvista.com/media/articles/radiantVista_ar_mythOfTalent.pdf

    Keep on! The world needs what you have to offer.

    –Murphy

    Comment by Anonymous — June 28, 2006 @ 10:19 am | Reply

  2. Darn it! The link broke. Here, paste this all together and you will see it

    http://radiantvista.com/media/artic

    les/radiantVista_ar_mythOfTalent.pd

    f

    Trust me, it is worth reading. The guy talks about talent and what it means. He just got a wild hair to be a photographer and was incrediby bad at it. But he kept on and became really good. The story is really encouraging…

    –Murphy

    Comment by Anonymous — June 28, 2006 @ 10:24 am | Reply

  3. That article was AMAZING!!! Thank you so much for the link. It was exactly what I needed, you have no idea. I am eternally grateful.

    Comment by chantal stone — June 28, 2006 @ 11:44 am | Reply


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